"Two minutes and thirteen seconds, your honor."
Well, maybe I exaggerate, but what does it matter? A day, a week, a month--who in her right mind would hand over her credit card to a virtual stranger? She trusted him, she claims. That's a lie. She never trusted him, not deep down. Betrayal is the story of her life. Thanks to her choice of boyfriends, she's always in debt.
Then there's the gal who comes before me who has let a guy move into her house after knowing him for a week. She is a successful businesswoman with a good head on her shoulders -- except for this. She describes how every night her new housemate would get duded up, borrow her car, and go out -- on business! She was supportive and patient. She was understanding. He was trying to make it in the restaurant business. That's why all his meetings took place after midnight. And she gave him the keys, her gas card, whatever. I wasn't born yesterday. All I had to do was take one look at this guy and I could read him like a bad novel. He wasn't and never had been the least bit interested in this very good-looking, middle-aged woman, who moved him into her home because she thought they had a relationship and perhaps a future together. He had the audacity to stand in front of me and proclaim that he'd made it clear to her from the start that they were just friends. She supports him, lends him money to start his own business, gives him her fancy car to drive every night, because she is a charitable woman. He is the aggrieved party. "She wanted more. She knew the deal. She's trying to get back at me because I don't want her."
Beauty Fades Dumb is Forever. Copyright (c) 1999 by Judy Sheindlin. Reprinted with permission from HarperCollins Publishers, Inc. All rights reserved.
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No Man's Land
by Simon Tolkien
Inspired by the experiences of his grandfather, J. R. R. Tolkien, during World War I.
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