Discuss Spinster by Kate Bolick: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

Posted Apr. 28, 2016

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davinamw

Join Date: 10/15/10

Posts: 3442

Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

Posted May. 04, 2016

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melanieb

Join Date: 08/30/14

Posts: 265

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

Yes, I made a similar choice in my 30s. I don't regret choosing to remain single, however I do sometimes wonder about the grass being greener on the "married" side.

Posted May. 05, 2016

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reene

Join Date: 02/18/15

Posts: 499

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

Bolick says, "to be someone's girlfriend, to have excellent sex on a semi-regular basis without any obligations and expectations of being in an exclusive relationship- I couldn't get enough of it." These are not the thoughts of a spinster. She popped in and out of relationships, but couldn't seem to make any decisions. Simply wanted it all. She wants to be a single, married spinster?

Posted May. 06, 2016

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dianaps

Join Date: 05/29/15

Posts: 460

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

Yes and I made a major mistake!

Posted May. 06, 2016

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donnac

Join Date: 03/26/14

Posts: 139

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

Oh boy, dianaps, I bet there's an interesting story there.

Posted May. 06, 2016

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dianaps

Join Date: 05/29/15

Posts: 460

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

Sorry, didn't mean to get personal.

Posted May. 06, 2016

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Windsong

Join Date: 05/07/13

Posts: 105

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

I had a hard time with her definitions of alone, single, spinster, etc. I was in a similar situation, and I made a decision that I didn't want to be in that relationship. It didn't bother me to end it because I did not want to be in it in the first place. I couldn't connect with the author's grief at ending it.

Posted May. 06, 2016

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donnac

Join Date: 03/26/14

Posts: 139

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

dianaps: Please don't be sorry. All our answers are personal. Well, mine will be too, when I get around to posting. Your post just sounded so mysterious to me and my Nosy Nelly kicked in, took over and posted something that I regret might have made you uncomfortable. No need for you to apologize. Indeed, it's I that should say I'm sorry. So...I'm sorry. I'm enjoying all your comments.

Posted May. 09, 2016

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barbm

Join Date: 02/04/16

Posts: 77

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

This situation never came up...I married my first love and he is my partner in life. But, imagining such a situation? I think I would take steps to learn my motivation and goals for relationships....Bolick communicates a lack of decisiveness and commitment to people, I think. I know many single women, and those attributes do not seem a commonality.

Posted May. 21, 2016

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suzanner

Join Date: 04/26/15

Posts: 27

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

No.

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Spinster

Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?

RE: Bolick's relationship with R creates a crossroad in her life. Have you ever had to make a similar choice? If you were in this position, what would you do?