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Being Mortal
An eye-opening and riveting look at how how medicine can not only improve life...
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Based on your reading of this book, what piecs of advice would you give to someone younger than you, a peer, and someone older?

Created: 09/16/17

Replies: 2

Posted Sep. 16, 2017 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
marianned

Join Date: 07/02/15

Posts: 37

Based on your reading of this book, what piecs of advice would you give to someone younger than you, a peer, and someone older?

(1) To someone younger, I would say two things: read "Being Mortal" now, and don't wait to show how much you value your family relationships. (2) To a peer, I would say: read "Being Mortal" now, and make sure you have completed an Advance Directive and any other document(s) that address your end of life desires. Discuss these with family members, whether they want to or not. (3) To someone older, I would say: read "Being Mortal" now, sit down with family to review how you want to be treated as you continue to age, and make sure you are seeing a gerontologist who will evaluate you as a person and not a patient. No matter how young or old we are, we are all people with individual needs.


Posted Sep. 17, 2017 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
ylhoff

Join Date: 10/23/12

Posts: 56

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RE: Based on your reading of this book, what piecs of advice would you give to someone younger than you, a peer, and someone older?

If you find yourself with a cancer diagnosis and all you are getting is information - a cut and dry view of what you should be doing and how - make it a priority to find medical staff who have learned the language of empathy. Make sure they have had some training and are open to options they may not be personally comfortable with. Realize that doctors are not gods, they are people. Only you hold the power to manage your life.

Begin planning for aging now. Have the hard conversations with yourself and then with whomever is most important to you. Write it down, make sure someone knows about it. Know that when you have done so and have something of a plan, you will actually feel better and you can move on with living.

Read up on how best to approach aging parents (who are likely from a generation that does not talk about the subject) and approach them to get the planning started. It took me years to get my wonderful mother to write a simple will ... but after dealing with the mess of my grandparents dying without direction, she knew it had to happen. The relief both she and I felt when she finally did it (and an advance directive) reassured us. We then went back to the daily business of living, laughing, and loving life. If your parent approaches you first, appreciate the amazing level of trust between you and move at their cadence.


Posted Sep. 24, 2017 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
juliep

Join Date: 04/07/12

Posts: 70

Expert

RE: Based on your reading of this book, what piecs of advice would you give to someone younger than you, a peer, and someone older?

Yes, I agree with above. Shop around for the right doctor, and be assertive about your care. For younger people, realize that aging is part of life and not something to avoid looking at. My husband didn't want our "kids" (oldest is 37) to see his 91-year-old mother as she declined, and I disagreed. They need to see that aging is part of life, and that hopefully they will learn how to cope with our aging.


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