Arlo is eager to organize a reunion once he finds out his father's cousin, Stanley, lives within driving distance. Why do you suppose he's so intent on this family get-together? Do you think the event met Arlo's expectations? Why or why not?
Created: 09/23/21
Replies: 18
Join Date: 10/15/10
Posts: 3442
Arlo is eager to organize a reunion once he finds out his father's cousin, Stanley, lives within driving distance. Why do you suppose he's so intent on this family get-together? Do you think the event met Arlo's expectations? Why or why not?
Join Date: 02/08/16
Posts: 514
Arlo wanted to "belong". Having other blood relatives gave him a sense of a wider family and he wanted to experience that. However, the reunion included Stanley's neighbors and friends and wasn't all that Arlo thought it would be. I believe Arlo wanted to instantly be a part of an extended family. The isolation of only having his mother through most of his life made him yearn for more.
Join Date: 01/01/16
Posts: 454
Join Date: 04/21/11
Posts: 264
I agree with Marcia. Arlo really tugged at my heartstrings with his yearning to be part of a family, yet his actions that caused his attempts at family to destruct. This was such a small yet pivotal scene as I think it exemplifies much of the book's overall theme - that we have an idealized family and an actual one and often the actual one is a much more painful version. Yet we yearn for the idealized version.
Join Date: 06/19/12
Posts: 408
Arlo grew up "unattached," -- certainly his mother didn't provide many opportunities for connection. I think he wanted both the experience of attachment to a larger, bonded group, and a history, which family provides. I think the specifics of the family reunion were disappointing to him. Surprisingly, his connections developed on a much smaller scale and over time with his sister and Pru.
Join Date: 03/20/16
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Join Date: 08/10/17
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Join Date: 10/16/10
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I think Arlo was intrigued by the idea of family, since he'd never really had one before. Since he had no previous exposure, I think his expectation of what it means to have relations wasn't realistic. He was expecting a lot of love and companionship that didn't materialize, and that's just not the way it works.
Join Date: 05/24/21
Posts: 82
Arlo didn’t know what it is like to have an extended family. At this time in his life, I think he longed to be a part of a family. He also wanted to better understand his father and learn what his relatives could tell him about his father. I imagine he was very disappointed in the outcome, except that he learned that his father was arrested for breaking into a house and writing graffiti on the wall after Enid’s accident. This at least showed that his father was not a perfect person.
Join Date: 09/06/16
Posts: 30
Arlo hadn’t any family except for his mother for almost his entire life. I think he wanted to be a part of a big family and the reunion was a great way to meet his extended family and to get to know them. Getting to know his relatives made him feel connected to his roots.
Join Date: 04/07/12
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Join Date: 09/03/19
Posts: 208
I agree with the previous posts that Arlo wanted to belong and he wanted relationships beyond his mother.I also think that his nomadic lifestyle made him long for a familial base. He knew his mother was undependable and finding a group to which he was related by blood would give him something he didn’t have. It is very sad though that he seemed to “ bite the hand that fed him” in regards to Spence and wanting a family. He seemed to want it so badly but just couldn’t help but break it apart. I don’t think his expectations were entirely met.
Join Date: 08/12/21
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Join Date: 04/25/11
Posts: 70
I think that Arlo wanted to belong - to find some roots- some commonality and connection to other people. Linda never gave him that security. Not only was he an only child, but the nomadic lifestyle, coupled with changing schools and living situations left Arlo with no family and no friends. So being part of Spence's family with some normalcy, probably made him want to know his family.
I was surprised that it was included in the book though because Pru didn't know much about Spence's family, and it didn't seem that Spence was especially interested in connecting with them either.
Join Date: 02/05/14
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Join Date: 12/04/20
Posts: 137
I think that Arlo wanted to have a family that he could be an integral part of and didn't know what that even meant. He was disappointed in the outcome, expecting some group of attached relatives who would welcome him into the flock, but finding a minimal number of relatives and others who were not family. He failed to see that to some friends are the family we create.
Join Date: 07/28/13
Posts: 16
So many insightful comments here about Arlo’s desire to belong. As one other person said, Arlo really tugged at my heartstrings. He was so eager for stability and additional family in his life. I liked the comment about his not recognizing found family, though I have the sense that Arlo never developed the kind of relationships or friendships that lead people to feel like they’ve discovered or created found family. That perhaps his early experiences prevented him from ever feeling safe enough to trust others to develop strong relationships or rely on others.
Join Date: 06/25/13
Posts: 347
I like Beth's answer about Arlo not knowing how to form friendships. He did not have much opportunity. Also, it seems just when he and his father are developing a friendship, Arlo pulls away. He is afraid something will go wrong and he will be left alone again. He is very anxious to help the family when they need him. but he really does not keep the friendship up.
Join Date: 08/12/16
Posts: 246
Arlo just wanted to connect with his family and I think he was hoping for a deeper connection with his dad through this activity, but as often times happen, the reunion wasn't all that he had hoped for. Although he did get some insight about his father from his cousin when he told him some stories about how Spence was when he was growing up. It didn't seem like communication was anyones strong point in the book, and Arlo was just trying to find out some details that he felt he had missed out on by not being in his dads life for so long.
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