Like any organized religion, it comes with its own set of rules and regulations, seemingly missing the point of spirituality in the long run. It seems that adults who have taken a path other than the one prescribed by the family religious tradition would often reflect on those prior traditions that gave them comfort or fond memories. I think she thought of herself as an atheist not because she didn't believe in a higher power, wherever that power might have been, but because she seemed to believe that not performing traditional acts somehow removed her from that possibility. How scary is that? The author more than once does interject phrases in Hebrew but doesn't give the meaning - I found that unfortunate. Similar to other ritualized religions, there appears to be a sense of guilt associated with any diversion from the rules. I found this sad and a source of additional emotional strain when it was not necessary. Spirituality and a spiritual community play a very big part in my own life. Having been raised in a religion with its own rules and interpretations of how one must live, it's taken years and a lot of reading, study, dialogue and comprehension to embrace that one's spiritual path in life is not driven by anyone's rules, orthodox or otherwise, but by ones compassion and efforts to see the holy in each person.