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Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

Created: 07/22/15

Replies: 16

Posted Jul. 22, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
davinamw

Join Date: 10/15/10

Posts: 1303

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Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

As parents, Caroline and Marc must decide how to help Julia tackle the emotional complexities of what has happened. Do you agree with the way they behaved? Do you think they're good parents?


Posted Jul. 26, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
Suzanne

Join Date: 04/21/11

Posts: 223

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RE: Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

The only behavior I might accept from the two of them was to suppress the rape of Julia for her well-being. But I am sorry they never followed through with any sort of recognition or punishment for the perpetrator. That was a letdown of their duty as parents.


Posted Jul. 26, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
robinn

Join Date: 12/06/14

Posts: 28

RE: Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

Caroline and Marc are totally out of touch as parents. It is gut wrenching to watch how they parent their girls. There is no way I would have allowed Julia, as my daughter, to be touched by a boy she barely knows. They seem to be watching a drama on TV not living it.


Posted Jul. 27, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
janeh

Join Date: 06/15/11

Posts: 158

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RE: Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

No -- I think they should have taken her to the hospital and completed a rape kit. At least that way she would have the option down the road when she was stronger to file charges for what happened to her. Then, gently, good parents could persuade her to help herself take charge of the situation by going on the offensive. I tend to think leaving it as they did will make the daughter think they don't realize the enormity of what the rape has done to her .... and maybe think it is something to be ashamed of or maybe even that she "deserved" it. I have never been raped but believe the most important thing would be to somehow psychologically take back possession of your being. The worst thing would be for everyone to just pretend it didn't happen or didn't matter.


Posted Jul. 27, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
julianna

Join Date: 10/10/13

Posts: 29

RE: Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

No not at all. I agree the daughter should have been treated at an emergency room and the rape reported. Caroline submitted to Marc's insistence because she was controlled by him as was the entire family.


Posted Jul. 27, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
barbluvstennis

Join Date: 07/16/11

Posts: 22

RE: Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

Marc and Caroline THINK they are good parents but they are sorely lacking. They do not seem to comprehend the parental role…They THINK about what they should do, rather than doing it…Action is needed when parenting, not just "good thoughts" Children need and want guidance and boundaries and it seems that Caroline and Marc did not understand this as a necessity …..Marc was also living a double life with SECRETS and shame…You cannot be present in any way for those who depend on you, when you are living a lie yourself..

No matter their intentions, they failed.


Posted Jul. 27, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
joyces

Join Date: 06/16/11

Posts: 392

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RE: Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

I think Marc was as usual looking out for himself and showing about as much concern for his daughter as he did for his patients. Caroline also dropped the ball and went along with him. Both should have been focused on getting her properly cared for, the crime reported and immediate mental health support for Caroline. As supposedly well educated and loving parents they totally dropped the ball and hid their heads in the sand.


Posted Jul. 28, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
juliep

Join Date: 04/07/12

Posts: 69

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RE: Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

It sounds as if Marc (and probably Caroline) really didn't know their daughter very well, but should they be blamed for that? I don't know - even good parents can be at a loss as to what their teens are up to. And I think they should have taken her to the hospital and police, though I know they were trying to protect her. Also, I thought they were a little lax in the way they parented their 13-year-old girl in terms of her relationship with Ralph's son, though maybe I'm a prude and/or behind the times?! Hey, I was in a Catholic school at that age and was totally scared of boys!


Posted Jul. 29, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
pennyp

Join Date: 03/22/12

Posts: 262

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RE: Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

Narc and Caroline's decisions regarding their daughter is a reflection of how they relate in general. That is to say: "What's in it for me?". The act of suppressing the rape is only a rationalization for keeping themselves from facing a difficult truth.


Posted Aug. 03, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
jeant

Join Date: 06/16/11

Posts: 17

RE: Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

No I most emphatically do not agree with their behavior or feel that they are good parents. Marc seemed more concerned with having his indiscretion with Judith potentially exposed if Julia's memory was restored and shared, than in taking the proper steps to ensure the physical and emotional well being of his daughter. Rather than standing up for her daughter and her needs, Caroline passively acquiesced to Marc's desires for avoidance and suppression. Suppressing the very real trauma of a rape is not a healthy way to "protect" one's daughter.


Posted Aug. 04, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
judithj

Join Date: 04/15/15

Posts: 45

RE: Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

I felt Caroline was a more conscientious parent and Marc was too lenient. If Marc had been more responsible when they all went to the beach to let off the fireworks, he would have noticed as soon as Julia left and gone after her. But he was too involved in enjoying himself. As the only parent present, he should have been paying closer attention.


Posted Aug. 04, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
alissac

Join Date: 05/14/15

Posts: 34

RE: Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

Both parents made me sick. I think there's a big difference, though, in geography...I mean, these parents are so removed from American standards that I can barely relate to them...American parents would not be cool with naked adults around their kids- or having said kids refers to as teases to friends sons. I couldn't keep my jaw from dropping at a lot of this novel...which made me blush, was I an American prude? Dang, though, there are so many flags as an American parent, I couldn't stop freaking out, even internally.


Posted Aug. 06, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
Sharlene

Join Date: 04/10/13

Posts: 78

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RE: Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

I would have been out of there the first time Ralph dropped his clothes in front of my daughters.


Posted Aug. 08, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
amberb

Join Date: 07/28/11

Posts: 77

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RE: Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

I completely agree with alissac - my standards definitely steer toward what would be considered overprotective American prude. To the best of my abilities, my 6- and 7- year-old boys are never around swearing, smoking, excessive drinking, inappropriate television or music - to say the least. I would not want them around people like Stanley or Ralph, period.

I couldn't imagine allowing my teenage girls to be around Stanley and Ralph in bikinis - ever. And it seems as though there was SO LITTLE supervision of them the whole trip. To me, 11 and 13 is still extremely young.

There were SO.MANY.RED.FLAGS. The 'game' with the pulling off of the swimsuits? That isn't a game.

After the rape, I think they should have had a rape kit collected, and as a physician, Marc would have had the means to even test it himself if he'd wanted.

Caroline never wanted to be at the house in the first place, but she still allowed them to be there. Maybe I'm a nag, but I would never have allowed my children to be there!


Posted Aug. 09, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
Terry R

Join Date: 12/26/11

Posts: 18

RE: Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

I, too, would have left with my children when Ralph began parading around in the nude. I think it sets such a bad example for teenage girls. Marc and Caroline seemed to want to prove how liberal they were... Anything to keep up. I cab't stand these people, but just keep reading. Kudos to the author. I do wonder, however, just how dark the author can be.


Posted Aug. 28, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
roberts

Join Date: 08/20/13

Posts: 31

RE: Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

Not much to add to the preceding comments. A more rational parental response would have included a medical exam with rape kit and professional counseling. Given their level of education and social stratum both parents should have known better. Marc, however, was relieved that the trauma of the beach may have caused Julia to forget the tryst with Judith if, in fact, she had witnessed it. Talk about misplaced priorities. And Caroline acquiesced to Marc in one of many displays of her weakness. All in all, grossly irresponsible parenting.


Posted Sep. 28, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
shirleyf

Join Date: 04/25/11

Posts: 31

RE: Do you agree with the way Caroline and Marc behaved? Do you think they're good parents?

Absolutely not. I think that they were irresponsible and selfish re. Julia and demonstrated poor parenting.


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