When is adaptation a reasonable response? Is sacrifice noble?

Meridian makes a concerted effort to follow her father's advice, which is to "make do." She adapts. When is adaptation a reasonable response? When does adaptation cross the line and become self-abnegation? Is sacrifice noble? What is "noble," and what is inappropriate martyrdom?

Adaptation is reasonable when the lack there of causes more harm than good. Sacrifice can be noble in certain circumstances but should not be done just to be noble.

Adaptation is required to survive. It changes through the times. Women of today would rarely adapt as she did

Most of us have made adaptations in our lives. We do it to survive and make things work. Possibly younger people do not do this as much, especially if they have more options. I do think that most mothers have made many sacrifices for their children. It might be to their career, their future wants, their person well being, finances etc.
adaptation is a reasonable response if there is a greater good. Sacrifice is what you sometimes have to do when you adapt.

I liked renem's response above. You always have to look at the balance before making a choice. The harm versus good assessment is essential. But as pennyp points out, we should try to make things work to the extent that we understand that nothing worthwhile comes without some sacrifice and some effort. While we know we have the opportunity to adapt, it doesn't mean we should give up on things too quickly. It is vital to understand that there can also be pain in making hasty decisions that cause us regret and sadness later. Part of the equation is that we have to be better equipped to make a good decision from the beginning to help us avoid having to make the painful choice of adaptation later.

I am willing to sacrifice... I sacrificed my education short term to marry.. but I did not 'adapt' I made him put me through school. I sacrificed when I temporarily lost mobility during a pregnancy, but I did not adapt to being immobile. I think adaptation is an 'old fashioned' idea. I do not want to adapt, unless it's in terms of 'early adaption' to new technology etc!
I think sacrifice can be noble, (like sending your child off to war) but it can also be false martyrdom. I agree it is a balance, a grace, an action that must be based on wisdom and love for another.

I think we all sacrifice in any relationship and sometimes adaptation is needed. I think it depends on the two people involved and knowing what is best for the relationship.

Adaptation happens every time one spouse changes their life for the other. Giving up a job, leaving friends, changing personal goals, all so that a spouse can follow his dreams, even with the knowledge that it will never be reciprocated. The sacrifices may be noble at the start; however, it's likely that regret and disenchantment will follow.

Adaptation is often still a part of marriage. Remember the time frame in which the book is written and that Ms Church greed up at Los Alamos. Yes, Meri followed her fathers advice in adapting, but also the way her mother adapted on the death of her father. Remember Meri did finish her degree and she decided to go to New Mexico. She did maintain dome of freedom, especially after meeting Belle and did find a friend in Emma. I wonder how her life might have been more one of sacrifice for a child if the pregnancy had not ended as it did.

Adapt - to become adjusted to new conditions
Sacrifice - the act of giving up something valued for the sake of something else regarded as more important or worthy

We all adapt as our situations change. We adjust to new conditions - whether they be marriage, children, divorce. Sacrifice is something different entirely. But, even then, we only sacrifice when we determine what we are giving up is less valuable than the desired result. Of course, the desired result is rarely the actual outcome. Sacrifice is a gamble. Adaptation is the natural occurrence of change through circumstance. For example, Meri adapted to life in New Mexico. She learned to educate herself, adjust to the social expectations, and even the climate. She sacrificed her formal education for Alden's career. Did the gamble work in her favor? Not by today's standards. And, not in Meri's perspective - at least for a long time. But, in the end, she chose him again. So, even though I'm not certain I would have made the same decisions or sacrifices, she made the second sacrifice (Clay) with her eyes wide open.

I think melindah put it beautifully. The only thing I would add is as I see it sacrifice only when it is mainly from a third person's point of view. We see sacrifice in others but if we feel we are making sacrifices it negates the nobility of the action.

Adaptation is part of human survival, and everyone must do it to some extent. However, when adaptation becomes or remains entirely one-sided and the person doing the adapting feels sad or angry and begins to feel as if life is passing him/her by, then it is obviously no longer reasonable. Sacrifice can be noble if the end results are for a greater good, but ruining one's life because you feel that you must stick by a previous commitment is not noble.