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The Headmaster's Wife
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There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?

Created: 05/07/15

Replies: 15

Posted May. 07, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
davinamw

Join Date: 10/15/10

Posts: 1318

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There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?

'Maybe, I think, this is what love is.' There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?


Posted May. 10, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
reene

Join Date: 02/18/15

Posts: 212

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RE: There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?

All love is real. Love is expressed in different forms, but it is all real.


Posted May. 10, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
lindah

Join Date: 04/17/14

Posts: 90

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RE: There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?

I agree with Reene. All love is real whether romantic, sexual, brotherly, parental, or based on God's love and sacrifice, agape.


Posted May. 11, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
antypam

Join Date: 08/14/14

Posts: 15

RE: There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?

All love is real, but all have their own definition of love.


Posted May. 11, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
MarieA

Join Date: 10/12/11

Posts: 149

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RE: There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?

Yes, love is real--the differences lie in the degree of love felt by the giver and the recipient


Posted May. 11, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
janp

Join Date: 05/11/15

Posts: 31

RE: There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?

I'm in agreement to prior responses. I think love is subjective from person to person, even more so when comparing (for example) love between like people. For instance, the love of a mother and father to their child. Each parent loves the child but who can say which is the "real love". I think love is manifested in many ways, especially in the way that we love someone because of how they make us feel about ourselves. It's like everything else, we can read all the reviews we want (of books, movies, wines, restaurants) but it is how it makes us feel that deepens the relationship, regardless of the opinions of anyone else.


Posted May. 11, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
Retired Reader, NE

Join Date: 09/16/11

Posts: 165

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RE: There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?

Real love can exist in all varieties. However, in this book most of the love was based on selfish needs.


Posted May. 11, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
barbarab

Join Date: 04/15/11

Posts: 39

RE: There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?

Yes, all love is love. Parental love is instantaneous and a true, all consuming love. Passionate love comes from desire & satisfaction, where the love in a marriage comes from living life & making the journey together. I feel, I saw all of these loves in this novel.


Posted May. 11, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
aleksandrae

Join Date: 02/25/14

Posts: 40

RE: There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?

As stated by others, love is love. In all its many splendid forms it is always true and powerful to those who experience it.


Posted May. 14, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
alissac

Join Date: 05/14/15

Posts: 34

RE: There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?

None of the relationships really seemed like "real" love, they are were a little off: Betsy and Arthur (about position), Betsy and Russell (fairy tale), Betsy and Ethan (super intense and kinda creepy, on her end), Arthur and Ethan (no common ground, hatred)...as a mother of 4, situations like this make me cringe bc none of us knows our own future with our children. What if we never truly bond with them? What if they hate us in the end? Or each other? Or the other parent? Holy cow.


Posted May. 16, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
dorisk

Join Date: 10/20/10

Posts: 23

RE: There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?

Parental love is usually real. In this case somewhat extreme but real.


Posted May. 19, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
flute4u

Join Date: 08/14/13

Posts: 23

RE: There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?

Although love between two people may seem to be a pure emotion, part of how each of us 'loves' another is learned. I think Arthur never received unconditional love from his parents and so did not know how to love his own son unconditionally. His love for Elizabeth seemed to be based on sexual attraction and control which is not the kind of self-giving romantic love that we envision between a husband and wife.


Posted May. 19, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
ElenaSpagnolie

Join Date: 10/10/11

Posts: 19

RE: There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?

I think flute4u raises a good point. People understand love in very different ways based on what they've seen modeled for them, their own personal needs and fears, and how they've been raised. It's possible that the most successful relationships are between two people who know themselves and their own motivations at a deep level.


Posted Jun. 01, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
susiej

Join Date: 10/15/14

Posts: 57

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RE: There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?

I agree completely with flute4u - Arthur's parents did not seem to unconditionally accept and love him - the love there seemed surface and the appearance of it was what seemed important. This does, I believe, truly affect how we love as we move on and away from our homes. How could Arthur love deeply and successfully when he had no model or example for this? I am not at all certain that all love is love - it may have the appearance of love but deep, abiding love is rarer than perhaps we know.


Posted Jun. 06, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
dorothyl

Join Date: 04/15/12

Posts: 80

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RE: There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?

They are all real to the person who is loving. While expressed differently, they are all manifestations of ourselves. The love we receive from our parents guides us in our future relationships and we model ourselves on our initial experiences of giving and receiving love. When that love relationship is healthy, we have a greater chance of developing good loving relationships ourselves. If it is selfish or controlling, we are more likely to be damaged. But I believe that role models other than parents can overcome damaged childhoods.


Posted Jun. 07, 2015 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
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mariannem

Join Date: 05/21/15

Posts: 5

RE: There are several varieties of love portrayed in the book: passionate affairs, marriage, parental love. Which relationships would you call real love?

Each type of love has its own reality. I think the deepest love is found in a good marriage. You go through a great deal when married to someone for many years....hardships, successes, children, illness, etc.


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