Quiara talks about being a "god-shopper." What’s your experience of religion been like? Can you relate to her quest to feel like she belongs?

Quiara talks about being a "god-shopper," trying out religions before finding something that suits her. What’s your experience of religion been like? Can you relate to her quest to feel like she belongs, or have you always had a spiritual home?

I grew up in the Lutheran church and was not pressed. Have had a strong belief in God since high school but quit going to church because of the hypocrisy I saw. A friend brought me to the Methodist church 15 years ago. With few exceptions I have loved the members I have served with and who taught me a true sense of serving others.

I finally joined a church in 1992 and I still belong. I like the people however my church is very conservative and I am not. So during the last election and the pandemic it has been a bit difficult for me. I also attend Bible Study Fellowship and Precepts. In both studies I have learned more about God, Jesus, the Bible then in all the years I have attended church! I do believe in God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit.

Growing up Catholic, I was aware the Church was sexist. I was active in the Church during a time I thought this was changing for the better. I used to think I would see an inclusive Church in my lifetime - now, not so sure I will. Yes, I have always felt like I wanted to belong, as an equal member without that stained glass ceiling.

Most definitely. I think many people try on different religious affiliations as part of trying to see what works for them. And Quiara's gods on her maternal side were quite extreme, at least from a mainstream view, so it is natural that she would examine where she fits in the religious spectrum. Most telling, however, was her conversation with her Yale classmates who asked if she believed in God and she admitted (very painfully) yes, but ultimately that guided her spiritual maturation.

I could relate especially during my teen years. I don’t think it’s unusual to be searching for and trying to experience a deeper meaning of life through religious expression.

I can definitely relate to her quest for belonging, particularly with regards to a church. I think I've attended just about every type of Christian service out there - Reformed, Baptist, Catholic, you name it. After three years of seminary I kind of decided organized religion wasn't for me, but I suspect I'll go back to a church, probably Lutheran, at some point. I miss the sense of community provided by a church congregation.

I definitely relate to this phrase, I was raised Southern Baptist, attended Presbyterian, Methodist, Assembly of God, and Catholic churches in my life, always looking to find what I really believed in. I joined and raised my family in the Methodist church as an adult, and remember finally feeling like I was living what I truly believed in, when I changed to that denomination. I understand why people don't subscribe to organized religion, though, and believe you can be a Christian without a church...just by living your daily life to be a witness to a christlike walk. But I think a lot of people are constantly looking for truth, hence "shopping" for God

I've had a very different experience than most of the readers who've posted responses. Both of my parents and extended family members were/are Jewish, and I was raised Jewish. I went to temple and had a Bat Mitzvah. However, I've always been more culturally Jewish than really religious and have always been comfortable with my choice.

I was raised Lutheran and we raised our sons Lutheran. I haven't "god-shopped" but "church-shopped." The few times I have moved I was fortunate to have a few Lutheran churches to check out before deciding on which one to attend. I have visited other religious services on occasion but haven't changed religions. I have always found a Lutheran church which was comfortable.

I know the feeling of believing in God, yet searching for an organized religion that validated and served all. I have remained a practicing Catholic, but I frequently disagree with the views of the mostly male church hierarchy and often have difficulty tailoring my beliefs and practices to dictated norms.

Definitely been bit of God Shopper. Have always been drawn to the Hope and Reassurance and Joy and Sense of Ultimate Justice that God represents to me. In youth groups in elementary and then early adult life - I’ve always been not far from it - trying out different churches. But couldn’t take (in adult years) the need to make others wrong if they didn’t believe the doctrine of that church. Miss it. May continue to seek out a Church - for the Community - “take what I want and leave the rest.”

What I have often heard touted about churches is the sense of community members find within their walls. "You are welcome." "Everyone belongs." I know in my times of hopelessness and despair, I have looked to numerous churches to fill the empty places inside of me. The problem for me was that no matter what church I went to, I still carried all the parts of me that felt unworthy and separate inside. I see "god-shopping" as a way to fix the inside from the outside. We can use religion, alcohol/drugs, sex, shopping, gambling, anything really to make ourselves feel like we are like other people. Until we work from the inside out, there will still be that missing piece of true belonging. At least it has been that way for me. I think that once Quiara really poured herself into learning about who she was, where she came from, etc., and accepted it- -her community appeared.

I can relate to this, my father was proof of it. He spent his childhood, following my grandmother's god shopping. She continue her habit of searching until her death at 87 years old. Her shopping left him with a sour taste for organized religion. He would join family at the tent services on Wednesday or Friday evenings, but not on Sunday services. Each Sunday morning, he cleaned the local pool hall for money to buy his own shoes and overalls. So when the ministers expressed their concerns, they never gave any thoughts to his putting his hard earned quarters in the donation plates on other days or the fact he needed to help support himself at 9 years old. What happen to acceptance, helping your fellow man, supporting your community? So he made it clear to mom his feelings about organized religion often commenting, "his God" wasn't found in a church pew but in his heart on a daily basis. Mom was given the job of providing any religious training to the children.