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The Removes


A powerful, transporting novel about the addictive intensity and freedom of...
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Discuss The Removes by Tatjana Soli:
Do you think Libby was foolish to marry a military man? Did she come to regret it? What were the benefits of the unusual life she ended up living?

Created: 08/22/18

Replies: 12

Posted Aug. 22, 2018 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
davinamw

Join Date: 10/15/10

Posts: 1584

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Do you think Libby was foolish to marry a military man? Did she come to regret it? What were the benefits of the unusual life she ended up living?

Libbie makes a bold decision for a young woman of her time and station, marrying a military man. Do you think it was foolish? Did she come to regret it? What were the benefits of the unusual life she ended up living?


Posted Sep. 08, 2018 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
Cynthia

Join Date: 06/07/17

Posts: 36

RE: Do you think Libby was foolish to marry a military man? Did she come to regret it? What were the benefits of the unusual life she ended up living?

Libbie wasn't interested in becoming the traditional wife of her times, so agreeing to marry a sexy, popular, charismatic military hero didn't seem out of character. Now the big question is, whether or not she was foolish for marrying him, why didn't she leave him? The entire marriage was riddled with lies, jealousies, love, unfaithfulness, emotional abuse, forgiveness, frenzied regular letter-writing to none, and when they were together for a long period of time, they barely spoke to each other. She also went through some horrendous inclimate weather and near starvation on the way to Fort Rice, during which time she could have just as easily frozen to death. During good times she benefited socially as the wife of a popular military man while they were in NY and she enjoyed the privileges of relatively good life (food, shelter, warmth) during Fort life. At the end of her life, I'm sure she would say she did not regret marrying her Autie.


Posted Sep. 09, 2018 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
janen

Join Date: 06/01/11

Posts: 49

RE: Do you think Libby was foolish to marry a military man? Did she come to regret it? What were the benefits of the unusual life she ended up living?

No I didn’t think she was foolish for marrying a military man. She was fully aware that she was on her way to being an old maid and I think that she saw this marriage as a way to be sociallly accepted with the burdens of being a full time wife. Even with all of the problems I really believe that she enjoyed her life.


Posted Sep. 11, 2018 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
PiperUp

Join Date: 10/27/15

Posts: 94

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RE: Do you think Libby was foolish to marry a military man? Did she come to regret it? What were the benefits of the unusual life she ended up living?

I didn't think she was foolish for marrying a married man but I did at times find myself frustrated that she was forced to accept her husband's cheating. I understand that given the time period, she didn't have an option but to accept it but I expected her to be angrier & resentful because of it. I don't think she regretted marrying Custer but maybe that every so often she wondered if she married the wrong Custer.


Posted Sep. 11, 2018 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
peggya

Join Date: 06/03/15

Posts: 22

RE: Do you think Libby was foolish to marry a military man? Did she come to regret it? What were the benefits of the unusual life she ended up living?

Libby seemed to be a bird in a gilded cage...put there in part by a cultural and gender bias but at the same time, of her own making. She showed very little agency in making decisions that worked for her. She was portrayed in strict contrast to Anne who despite a brutal and hostile environment always seemed to be looking for a better path out of her misfortunes.


Posted Sep. 12, 2018 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
peggyt

Join Date: 08/10/17

Posts: 26

RE: Do you think Libby was foolish to marry a military man? Did she come to regret it? What were the benefits of the unusual life she ended up living?

From the story, it seemed that she wanted a more exciting life than what she would have had if she stayed settled in her home town and did what was expected of her.


Posted Sep. 12, 2018 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
miriamb

Join Date: 05/29/18

Posts: 8

RE: Do you think Libby was foolish to marry a military man? Did she come to regret it? What were the benefits of the unusual life she ended up living?

She loved Autie so I don't think she was foolish to marry him. She regretted his unfaithfulness but came to terms with it. She lived a life she chose and loved him. Loved the last paragraph of the last Libbie section- what lyrical writing.


Posted Sep. 16, 2018 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
bonnieb

Join Date: 09/11/11

Posts: 123

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RE: Do you think Libby was foolish to marry a military man? Did she come to regret it? What were the benefits of the unusual life she ended up living?

Libby was smitten by Autie's reputation and his self-confidence about himself and with the ladies. She disliked some aspects of being a military wife, especially when they were separated, but she never regretted her choice to marry Autie. He was her great love. After his death, she moved to New York City and never remarried.


Posted Sep. 16, 2018 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
gailh

Join Date: 08/26/17

Posts: 10

RE: Do you think Libby was foolish to marry a military man? Did she come to regret it? What were the benefits of the unusual life she ended up living?

I don't think Libby was foolish to marry a military man, per se, but I do think she made a mistake in marrying Autie. Other than the challenge of attracting his attention, I failed to see what bound them together. He was not a man who would ever be a loyal, faithful spouse. As the thought did cross her mind now & again, perhaps she picked the wrong brother.


Posted Sep. 17, 2018 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
kimk

Join Date: 10/16/10

Posts: 324

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RE: Do you think Libby was foolish to marry a military man? Did she come to regret it? What were the benefits of the unusual life she ended up living?

I don't think it was foolish but it the decision certainly came with its challenges. It provided her with a lot more freedom than most women of her day had and it provided adventures, but it also came with long periods of inactivity and loneliness.


Posted Sep. 17, 2018 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
vivianh

Join Date: 11/14/11

Posts: 44

RE: Do you think Libby was foolish to marry a military man? Did she come to regret it? What were the benefits of the unusual life she ended up living?

No. Libby made her choice with full knowledge that she was rebellious. She showed her resilience by continuing to pursue reha the for her husband the rest of her life. Who am I to second guess her choices? Libby made a modern choice. She wanted to escape the confines of her upbringing. She would never overtly regret her decision. So, who are we to judge?


Posted Sep. 19, 2018 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
acstrine

Join Date: 02/06/17

Posts: 59

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RE: Do you think Libby was foolish to marry a military man? Did she come to regret it? What were the benefits of the unusual life she ended up living?

At the very beginning of the book, Libby tells Autie that she will not ride with him because he is "the son of a farmer". He wasn't good enough for her. He returned from the Civil War, a hero- -a swan, which excited Libbie because her every day small town experiences were so much less than exciting. It was now acceptable for her to pursue a relationship with him. He had improved his station.

What hadn't improved was his character. But for whatever reason (and I believe there were many), Libbie was determined to win him over. And she knew before the marriage that Autie would be both her savior and her tormentor.

I don't think any of this had to do with the fact that Custer was a military man. He was from a large, boisterous family. He needed to be bold and loud to stand out. His antics guaranteed him the attention he craved. It was his character, not his profession, that may have caused Libbie to second guess herself. However, once you have decided that one person is responsible for "saving" you, it is difficult to walk away. Libbie also held a lot of power over Custer. He needed her to calm his fears, boost his mood, and soothe his ego. She was his calm and constant in a life that was neither. They were both very dependent on one another.


Posted 18 hours ago Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
JillL

Join Date: 10/19/16

Posts: 3

RE: Do you think Libby was foolish to marry a military man? Did she come to regret it? What were the benefits of the unusual life she ended up living?

I don't think she was foolish, but she had no idea the challenges a military wife faces. She seemed to accept her marriage and her place in Custer's life. I think the benefits were living a life outside the norm.


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