Do you think Falk was wrong about his father?

The legacy passed from one generation to the next, is a theme throughout Force of Nature. Falk has an idea of who his father was, but his colleague Carmen has another take. Do you think Falk was wrong about his father?

Short answer, it appeared so.

We are all wrong about our parents in some way.

Maybe. Not being a parent myself, I'm not sure how to answer. But, having parents, I know that no matter what I do, they love me. I believe by the end of the book Falk realized his dad did love him and only did what he felt was best for Falk.

I don't think we can ever truly know another person. Falk was carrying knowledge of his father from his childhood (see The Dry) which impeded him from seeing him wholly. But who amongst us hasn't done that!

Many parents rarely discuss decisions they make with their children. It's not that they don't care, but each person is dealing with their own challenges in coping with changes. Their lack of communication is nothing new...just sad.

I think Falk should have given his father a chance. When someone is sick you never know when it will be their last time seeing one another.

It seems his father was not a good communicator. I think Falk was very surprised to learn how his father had recorded their experiences. I do think he was wrong.

I think we're always "wrong" about our parents. As children we have a very different perspective about them than the rest of the world might. In Falk's case, I think his father brought some of it on himself. I have the advantage of having read The Dry, though, much of which was about the way his father handled a situation that arose in that novel.

I think his father was as unhappy about moving out of the country as was Falk and it affected him deeply. Out of the element he loved he was a person without footing and this might have affected all his relationships.

I think Erin was erroneous in his judgement about his father when the novel began. His beliefs and feelings have been with him for a long while - we know that from Harper's first novel. He was young - had little insightful experience. I think through his growth and experience and the help of his partner, Carmen, he comes to see his father and his early life in a new light - one which hopefully will enable him to be happier in future novels that Harper writes which include him. He is now more forgiving and understanding - healthier emotionally.

You find out about the relationship between Falk and his father in The Dry, the first book of the series. Because of an event you learn that Falk and his father had been very close but forced to leave their home. Falk was a teenager and held it against his father that his father didn't stand up to town bullies. At that point Falk wanted nothing to do with him and his father also withdrew. In Force of Nature, Carmen helps Falk see hs father from a different perspective and, of course, Falk was wrong. In his defense he was a teenager and that is a time for pulling away from your parents anyway. As someone already stated we can never really know our parents.

I, too, read The Dry and so knew the background of the rift. As stated by several others, children and teen-agers have very different perspectives many times of what determines parents' decisions and actions. Often, either because the child is too young to understand or because the parents want to protect the child, the parent does not share the decision making process. Sometimes, as in the case of Falk, the situation is never discussed and so each person carries their own memories and resentments, if any. These two men were so alike that neither had the gumption to open the discussion and so alienation resulted. Sometimes, at or near death, there is a resolution--oft times the resolution is never reached, because the thing was left lying until it was too late. Happily, for Falk, Carmen was close enough to reach him and objective enough to try.

Most of us are women who responded to this question. It would have been interesting to hear more opinions from men who knew their fathers and how they communicated. It does seem that Falk was being harsh in judgement of his father.

Having not read the other books, I'm basing my answer on this book alone. I felt that Falk was angry at his father and felt that his father hadn't cared about him or his feelings. Obviously this wasn't true. The hiking maps revealed that his father really wanted a relationship with his son and hoped to build that through hiking trips he wanted the two of them to share.

Our parents have full lives before we are ever born, so it’s impossible for us to fully know them, what they have been through, etc. It’s almost impossible for us to fully realize the love they have for us. So yes, he may have been wrong.

Children often judge their parents harshly. I don't honestly know the answer to this question.

I think we want to see people as good or bad. If they do something bad they are bad. Which means you have to discard the good. To let both exist and understand that complexity and ambiguity is very difficult, and I think most of us do it. Especially with parents where we have a tendency to expect a certain level of selflessness and self awareness that most people are not capable of. Again, this kind of goes back to the other question about forgiveness, it's almost an ongoing necessity, for ourselves and each other.

I think it is all a matter of perspective. That perspective can change over time. As we become adults, we better understand the adult parent we may have wrongly characterized when we were children/teens because we have a chance to look at that parent with more mature eyes and feelings. Falk obviously embraced one perspective about his father, but began to alter that view as he had a chance to see the keepsakes his father left behind. These real maps provided a different kind of map that allowed Aaron to come to a grown-up understanding. It was then that he was able to absorb the messages his father was obviously unable to convey as Aaron grew up. It is as if each person is looking across a river at the other. If asked to describe what he sees, each person will give an accurate description, but it is not at all what the other sees. Both are "right" and both are "wrong". It is all a matter of perspective.

Falk knows he had a made mistakes. He was blaming himself. It seems like regret and grief were destroying him. I think that why he had that the picture of him and father was faced backward. Everyone reacts differently with grief. Like other states, Falk’s dad maps were the unspoken words of love.

I had not read The Dry prior to reading Force of Nature. I was not sure if he was wrong about his father, but that part of the story was the least interesting to me in an otherwise good story. As for being wrong about parents in general, most people realize that the Mom and Dad who seem to have all the answers when we are toddlers are just people trying their best (with the exception of the abusive situations we read about in papers and see on television, of course.) Children, even teenagers, rarely think of their parents as people who were once teenagers or young adults themselves with hormones racing and life-changing decisions resting on immature shoulders. So, yes, people are often wrong about something when it comes to their parents.

I guess I will have to go back and read The Dry. I did not quite understand the problem. As a parent, who has had teenagers, I realize we are living on different planets and we try to do our best by them. They quite often do not understand this, Luckily, my children and I have been able to laugh together about things that happened then

Yes, I thing his father was a very private man and did not always know how to show emotions especially to his son. I think his fathers way of showing him that he cared was to plan hikes out into the back country. This was his of spending time with his son but his son gave up in showing any interest in these outings. I think this was the fathers way of showing his son who he was as a person. Often children do not understand their parents intentions. A good rule of thumb is to remember that actions speak louder than words.

I just finished the first book in the series, The Dry. I sure learned a lot about Aaron ‘s and his father’s past. If you have not read it and enjoyed this book do read it. I thought both were excellent mysteries.