Gates asks, "How do you follow your plan and yet keep listening to new ideas?" Have you ever had to convince people in your work or family life to see things from a different perspective?

The Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation was first interested in transforming agriculture through science alone—developing seeds that would help farmers grow more food—but ultimately discovered that gender bias would keep better seeds from reaching or benefiting the people who plant them. The resistance of some team members to shift views leads Gates to ask in the book, "How do you follow your plan and yet keep listening to new ideas? How can you hold your strategy lightly, so you'll be able to hear the new idea that blows it up?" Have you ever had to convince people in your work or family life to see things from a different perspective?

I think this is particularly challenging for me. My gut reaction is to think I'm right, I know how to do things, I don't need to change. It really takes a lot for me to be flexible. I almost always refuse to entertain different ideas at first, and have to very deliberately ponder the pros & cons of something before I change course.

I've tried to get people to see things from a different perspective (especially, recently, politically) but I think it's an uphill battle. I might be projecting, but I think most people get pretty invested in their own perspectives and have a very challenging time seeing it from another's point of view. Not that long ago I had a debate with a friend about voting rights, and while she seemed swayed by my arguments, I don't really think I changed her mind.

kimk is right. This is very challenging. I, too, find it very difficult to listen to those who disagree with me without actually arguing, which usually means neither of us sees a new path in any direction.

I think we have a real problem in this country getting people to step back and take a second look at things. Jon Meacham talked about this in politics. No one likes change, but life is constantly changing. I've always thought every so often you need to reassess what you are doing and thinking. This applies to political parties, religion and many other beliefs. These keep evolving and if you don't look again at what is happening and whether your thoughts and beliefs align with the present day, it is amazing what you can discover and what you need to change. I wish more people would be willing to do that and not continue doing "what they have always done".

I think listening is the key here. This was really evident with the sex workers in India. The Gates Foundation went in and tried to convince the women to use condoms but the women weren't interested and didn't see that as something that would help them. But after really listening and not talking they discovered that the women were more concerned about preventing violence on a day-to-day basis. If they had a way to prevent this, then they could engage on the use of condoms. It's so important to listen and not just assume that we know what the problem is. This is something I need to be better at.

I really don't think you can influence people to change their minds unless they are already in a frame of mind to be open to other ideas. People develop opinions based on perceptions they have, whether those perceptions are accurate or not. We live in a world where it is not always easy to know if something is 100% true so instead of trying to change other people's opinions, I just try to stay very open minded myself. I have realized over a lifetime that most things are not black or white, but varying shades of gray. The truth is often in the gray zone.