Decorum

In today's society, brevity is appreciated, such as text message acronyms. Technology has made us experience life so differently. Daisy Goodwin's focus on conversations and the niceties that were valued is so appealing. What other differences are there between then and now that you either like or don't like and why? I would love to have a conversation with someone who was 100% focused on the conversation instead of texts, emails, etc. and who used 10 words to a sentence instead of five. Flowery language has its place. sometimes.

The 19th century conventions of a need for chaperons and the rigid adherence to what is proper conduct would be maddening today in a time when we are accustomed to direct, honest speech. The notion that Charlotte would no longer be "marriageable" after booking passage to America with Casper seems silly to us. I do like the contemplative conversations and letter-writing the slower pace allowed and the incredibly efficient system of receiving mail several times daily that promotes it. The emphasis on good manners and the observance of social customs made for more pleasant social intercourse. For the privileged classes and weathy individuals such as Charlotte, life could be very pleasant allowing one to pursue interests such as riding, photography, the arts and writing. There is much benefit from leisure.

There is so much about living in th 19th century that limits life as we know it, that it is nearly impossible for me to even imagine myself in that world. That being said lindah, i do miss long, meaningful, intelligent conversation. It seems an art that is slipping away. As for letter writing, I know only a few that respond in the same manner. Email, texting and what ever else is electronically available seems the only way to connect.
I am surprised at how many kids are being raised without any idea of what decorum means. I recently read that corporations are sending newly employed to a "charm school" type training to bring them up to speed on etiquette! Is that the same "upper class" mentality from back in time? And some things never change, do they? Know anyone who easily fill the role of each of the main characters. Opportunity seems to be assigned in various degrees of availability.

I think one could ask if there is a "fairytale" nature to the novel And does decorum some how fit into that discussion? How real is the "happy ever after" ending?

I would love to experience a time period that was not dictated by the philosophy of brevity, faster, & shorter. A time where the words you used mattered and were well thought out. A time where people were fully engaged instead of wondering if any new texts/e-mails have arrived. A time where your charm & eloquence was as important as your beauty and allure. But those times are gone, and all we can do is try to adapt to the new way and teach our children how things used to be & hope they pick up a lesson or two on proper etiquette.

I find it interesting that advice columns are still printed in newspapers to answer the public's queries about how to handle situations. Some are very good - there is even a Miss Manners column in some papers. Maybe everyone should be given a copy of Emily Post's Etiquette book.