Have you ever had a family member or loved one suffer through Alzheimer's? How did your family react?

David's family is faced with one of the most difficult diseases in our world today - Alzheimer's. Have you ever had a family member or loved one suffer through the disease? How did your family react?

We have a former very close friend with this disease. Unfortunately, this person became so mean and talked so badly about whatever friend or family member was not present at that moment that friends were soon hesitant to have any contact. This person "remembered" events that never happened. Soon friends had to stop visiting and just let family or hired caretakers have the personal contact for fear of being accused of theft and/or unaccceptable behavior. It was sad and disturbing at the same time.

I had an uncle that had Alzheimer’s. My mother’s only remaining sibling of 7. They were both in their 80’s. It made my mother extremely sad to visit.

Watching a loved one suffer through the various stages of Alzheimer’s is extremely painful not only for the patient but also for loved ones. Without going into detail it was almost a blessing when she got to the point where she no longer recognized people and just sat around unresponsively. At least she appeared to be at peace after years of paranoia and fear. This is a devastating disease.

Yes, I took care of my mother-in law that lived with us. Alzheimers is a cruel and miserable disease. I was teaching and commenting a distance away, I had a teenage son at home, and my father had a stroke. I had to hire help, and my husband and I attended special workshops for family with Alzheimers. What a terrible time!! It was especially hard on my son.

Yes, my grandfather had Alzheimer's. It was so sad, because he was such a bright, fun man. After he was diagnosed, if he made mistakes or got confused, he'd often say, "There's Mr. Alzheimer's coming." It was sad that he knew what was coming but couldn't do anything about it. In the end, even if he was confused about who we were, if he saw a child, he'd immediately reach out for them and try to goof around with them like he did when my siblings and cousins and I were kids. Alzheimer's took a lot from him, but not his love for children.

My grandma was amazing. Once he was moved into a care facility, she went to see him three times a day, to help him with each meal. He had spoiled her as long as he could, and she did the same when it was her turn. A big part of her just seemed so lost without him, much like the rest of us. I still miss them both so much, they were a great example of love and devotion.

Yes. My husband was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's at age 59 and died a few months before his 70th birthday. We agreed when he was diagnosed that we would approach the next years with as much laughter as possible to get us through the hard times. Looking back, nine years after his death, I'm not sure how I managed, but at the time, I just did what needed to be done each day and really didn't consider the
difficulty. It is a terrible way for a loved one to die as they die a little each day, and your pain increases a little each day.

I have had relatives and friends go through this terrible disease. I have seen early onset and confusion beginning in eighty year olds. Mood swings, sweet moments, and utter despair are all part of it. As for family reactions, some choose to disengage quickly, others gradually, and a few shining souls stay the course throughout. All experience grief and deal with it in their own way. I don't think there is a right or wrong here.

My husband was diagnosed in mid 40's and died at 58. Our families reacted in various ways, although none got too involved in the caregiving or support. I understand that their reactions were all a part of their grief in losing the brother, son, friend they knew. As his widow, I now facilitate caregiver support groups and grief management groups, because one of the greatest problem caregivers face is ISOLATION, with no one to talk to who truly understands what this Alzheimer Journey is all about.

My family has not, but friends have. One friend was forced to quit work but still enjoys some social interaction with old friends even if her past memories are jumbled. In another case it was hard for the family as the person involved was home and needed care. In this case David was fortunate as he had found a care giving institution.

My grandmother was diagnosed in her 70's (although looking back the onset probably started in her late 60's). She was an eccentric lady that always made me feel special. It was very difficult to watch the disease progress and her personality change so drastically. The last time I visited her she couldn't speak and life was very sad for all of us.
Maybe my experience is the reason I find it so hard to accept David's arrangement.

My mother had Alzheimer's during the last three years of her life. I was her caregiver even though I have two brothers and a sister. It was difficult to see that she wasn't the person she once was and she gave me some difficult times. She knew me but she did not remember the grandchildren. She passed away just two months before she turned 99 years old.

My dad has Lewy Body Dementia, which is different from Alzheimer’s, but quite a cruel disease itself. Lots of hallucinations and a loved one who is never really himself again or able to carry on coherent conversations. His wife, my stepmother, and he have been Matt for 25 years and her devotion to him and his care is extraordinary. She kept him at home for as long as she could, but he is now in a memory care unit and she visits every single day for 8 hours a day. My parents divorced because of my dad’s affair with his now-wife. even before he got LBD, we would sometimes celebrate holidays all together with extended family. Last Easter, when my dad was still able to leave his care center, my dad, his wife, and my mom and I had Easter together. It was actually very nice. I think for all of us. Especially for me, a child of people I love and with whom I want to celebrate things together.