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You'll Forget This Ever Happened


Secrets, shame, and adoption in the 1960s—a poignant tale of a mother's enduring...
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Laura refuses to use an alias in the maternity home. Why do you suppose she draws the line where she does?

Created: 02/16/23

Replies: 17

Posted Feb. 16, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
davinamw

Join Date: 10/15/10

Posts: 3442

Laura refuses to use an alias in the maternity home. Why do you suppose she draws the line where she does?

When Laura fills out paperwork at the maternity home, she's given the option of using an alias. What purpose do you think this served? She refuses to change her name; why do you suppose she draws the line where she does?


Posted Feb. 16, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
Marcia S

Join Date: 02/08/16

Posts: 514

RE: Laura refuses to use an alias in the...

It wasn't Laura's idea to hide, it was her parents. Thus, she didn't hide behind a fake name. I think she also realized that if her child wanted to find her someday, using her real name would help in that search.


Posted Feb. 16, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
judyg

Join Date: 04/20/11

Posts: 72

RE: Laura refuses to use an alias in the...

My Mom was the one who demanded I follow this rule in the maternity home. I made a very close friend who was my roommate and I regret I was unable to stay in touch with her afterwards.


Posted Feb. 16, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
BeeBee

Join Date: 12/04/21

Posts: 12

RE: Laura refuses to use an alias in the...

I think she wanted to remain true to herself and not hide behind a different identity. I also wonder if she was hoping her child would find her some day.


Posted Feb. 16, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
PKH

Join Date: 01/29/21

Posts: 120

RE: Laura refuses to use an alias in the...

She wasn't trying to hide from the situation. Her parents were embarrassed but she wasn't.


Posted Feb. 16, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
mceacd

Join Date: 07/03/18

Posts: 132

RE: Laura refuses to use an alias in the...

Laura was broken-hearted by her boyfriend and her parents, but she was not ashamed. She showed bravery.


Posted Feb. 17, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
PinkLady

Join Date: 01/22/18

Posts: 192

RE: Laura refuses to use an alias in the...

She wanted it recognized that she is a real person, tired of pretending. She needed to hang on to herself and her identity. At least she didn't need to lie about who she was


Posted Feb. 17, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
Ellen

Join Date: 08/05/22

Posts: 11

RE: Laura refuses to use an alias in the...

It was the one way she could rebel against the whole situation. Her whole world was turned upside-down by the pregnancy. She wass rejected by her boyfriend and berated by her parents and then hidden away at this home for unwed mothers. She could at least keep her own name and identity while she was there. In the same way, she named her unborn baby and projected an identity onto the baby during her pregnancy. It was her way of surviving.


Posted Feb. 17, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
rosemarys

Join Date: 05/29/11

Posts: 43

RE: Laura refuses to use an alias in the...

Laura had lost so much of her life and identity due to her pregnancy so I think it was important to her that she at least keep her name.


Posted Feb. 23, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
harriett

Join Date: 11/03/21

Posts: 9

RE: Laura refuses to use an alias in the...

I agree that not adopting an alias was her way of rebelling against the whole situation. Naming her baby was the same.


Posted Feb. 25, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
catherynez

Join Date: 01/27/18

Posts: 98

RE: Laura refuses to use an alias in the...

She wasn’t trying to hide. It was her parents who were.


Posted Feb. 25, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
scottishrose

Join Date: 07/24/11

Posts: 228

RE: Laura refuses to use an alias in the...

It was the one thing she still had control of in her life, so she chose to keep her own name.


Posted Feb. 26, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
susannd

Join Date: 03/12/21

Posts: 21

RE: Laura refuses to use an alias in the...

I think Laura wanted to remain true to her self.


Posted Mar. 01, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
beckyd

Join Date: 07/31/19

Posts: 92

RE: Laura refuses to use an alias in the...

I too think it was her way of rebelling and holding her ground any way she could.


Posted Mar. 02, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
kdowney25

Join Date: 01/25/16

Posts: 183

RE: Laura refuses to use an alias in the...

Laura said she did not want to change her name so that it would be easier for her child to find her. She was not willing to eliminate this child from her life and by keeping her legal name she was keeping an avenue open for future contact should her child search for her.


Posted Mar. 08, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
Joyce

Join Date: 10/14/21

Posts: 97

RE: Laura refuses to use an alias in the...

I agree with all comments above, especially the way Ellen summed it up.


Posted Mar. 14, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
turtlewoman

Join Date: 02/13/14

Posts: 8

RE: Laura refuses to use an alias in the...

Laura's family was ashamed of Laura's pregnancy, but she wasn't. Using an alias would make it look like she was ashamed, so she didn't use one.


Posted Apr. 02, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
rebeccar

Join Date: 03/13/12

Posts: 548

RE: Laura refuses to use an alias in the...

I think it simply is what Laura stated in the book: she wanted her child to be able to find her. Of course at that time Laura had no idea how easy it will be to track a real name with the internet.


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