To what extent do you believe it is possible for a happy relationship to be founded on colossal untruths? Is it possible to love someone and not really know who they are?

In Emma and Leo we initially see a devoted couple with a deep and seemingly genuine connection. To what extent do you believe it is possible for a happy relationship to be founded on colossal untruths? Is it possible to love someone and not really know who they are?

I think the happy relationship, founded on untruths, is possible until those hidden truths surface. Losing trust in a partner is something I see as very damaging—even fatal.

I believe that Leo is the exception to the rule on surviving relationships with colossal untruths. The extent of Emma’s lies ran long and deep; she could have easily found herself alone by the end of this novel. It’s certainly reasonable to say that it will be difficult, if not impossible, for Emma to build complete trust with Leo again.
I do believe you can love someone without knowing who they truly are.

I what you say above is true, why are there so many books, TV shows, movies about this occurring-and many restart their relationships because there love for each other seems to be so true. We are humans, we are fallible, and us guys just sometimes don't think straight. I'm married 47 years wouldn't want to exchange that for the world.

I do. Depending on the circumstance one must accept the frailty of man and the decisions one makes to thrive

A relationship with hidden secrets is damaging. When those secrets are revealed, I think you then are always asking yourself if there are more secrets, and what current secrets may be hidden. As to loving someone you don't really know, we love the person they present to us. I recently lost what I thought was a dear friend after I found out that how he presented himself to me was all based on lies.

I do believe it is possible and happens quite often that someone loves the illusion they see, smell, hear, taste and touch. And I don’t believe we can ever truly know someone completely. There have been times when I’ve felt I don’t completely know myself. Watch Investigation Discovery Channel for a weekend and see examples of people loving someone and discovering everything was a lie. Think of the families shocked to discover Dad is a serial killer. I have a dear friend who was married for 15 years to someone only to discover her husband was gay and using her for a corporate beard. Too often the heart overtakes the mind.

I agree with TerryPark in that a loving relationship based on lack of truth is entirely possible between two individuals - at least until the hidden truths begin to surface. Then it would be tough to heal the rift and develop complete trust again. That's not to say it cannot be done because obviously it often is - not only in fiction but in the real world. For Leo, I don't think it would be so hard because the hidden truths were connected to something he, himself, had dealt with - adoption - and when he discovered the unusual turn of events Emma dealt with in that regard, he was not only able to forgive but he supported her in finding Janice and welcoming Charlie into their lives.

I completely agree with TerryPark above. I have to admit I have a difficult time empathizing with Emma after 20 years of lies. It seems if she truly loved Leo, she would have told him years ago about bearing that child 20 years ago, and I'm quite sure he would have continued to love her.

I feel it is possible to love someone and not fully know them. We may fall in love with someone before we know much about them. Then, either the love deepens or we fall out of love, maybe based on learning more about them.