What do Michelle's experiences reveal about the effect American society has on mixed-race people of Asian heritage?

Michelle touches on various incidents of racism and alienation throughout her life, and discusses both idealizing whiteness and fearing that she is not Korean enough. What does this reveal about the effect American society has on mixed-race people of Asian heritage?

I think mixed race children often deal with this struggle. The pull toward or away from one side of their heritage to another. There is how they feel inside and how society views them. Sometimes how they are seen doesn't reflect how they feel. My son deals with this issue and it is not easy sometimes.

Michelle grew up in Eugene, Oregon, a small community where she was one of the few mixed-race children. When she went to college on the East Coast, worked in the restaurant there, began singing and touring with her band, she lost a lot of her Korean-ness. When her mother became ill and she moved back to Eugene to care for her, she became aware of her identity once again and worked to regain the gifts of language and food and caring that her mother had given to her.

Her experience shows how many mixed race children often feel like they are part of both, but at the same time neither parent's cultures. At school Michelle felt outcasted from her white peers, and in the Korean community she didn't feel like the belonged either.

I think this is a common mixed-race child experience -- they feel like they don't belong anywhere -- not American enough and when they go with parents to their home country, they don't feel like they fit in there either. It can also be more difficult because growing up is hard on everyone but finding your identity can be more complicated.

I agree mixed race children don’t ever fit in 100% with either side of the family. Back in the 50s my mother had a Jewish father and Catholic mother and neither side accepted her. Mixed race children have the families judgement and society as a whole because you can’t hide what you look like.

Michelle did a fantastic job of articulating what it must feel like to never be quite enough for either culture. A coming-of-age story like Crying in H-Mart has the potential to help others who are in similar circumstances. It made me think back to the chapter in The Catcher in the Rye when Mr. Antolini essentially tells Holden that he is not the first person to feel like he does and that, fortunately, some of those people wrote books about their experiences. I can see a number of people reacting to this book like that.

I agree that mixed race children do have a difficult time. And her childhood was made more difficult because she was from a small community. Perhaps if she had been raised in a big city where there would have been more mixed race children she might have adapted better. Or at least she would have had friends in her same situation.

The knowledge that mixed race children have identity issues is a valuable message explained in this book. I am not sure there is really a “cure”, but non-mixed race teachers, parents and others can help alleviate the concerns once they are aware,

Life is all about wanting to belong. Michelle never felt that she belonged. She spent every other summer completely immersed in Korean culture and then returned to her very rural, white community. Michelle’s mother had such a difficult transition, it would seem that she would have been more aware of her daughter’s need for understanding.