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The Henna Artist


The Henna Artist opens a door into a world that is at once lush and fascinating,...
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When Radha enters Lakshmi's life, Lakshmi becomes responsible for raising her headstrong younger sister. Do her conflicts with Radha resonate with any of your experiences parenting teenagers?

Created: 03/27/20

Replies: 12

Posted Mar. 27, 2020 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
davinamw

Join Date: 10/15/10

Posts: 3442

When Radha enters Lakshmi's life, Lakshmi becomes responsible for raising her headstrong younger sister. Do her conflicts with Radha resonate with any of your experiences parenting teenagers?

When Radha enters Lakshmi's life, Lakshmi becomes responsible for raising her headstrong younger sister. Do her conflicts with Radha resonate with any of your experiences parenting teenagers?


Posted Apr. 03, 2020 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
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bestmartin

Join Date: 02/20/13

Posts: 103

RE: When Radha enters Lakshmi's life, Lakshmi becomes responsible for raising her headstrong younger sister. Do her conflicts with Radha resonate with any of your experiences parenting teenagers?

It doesn’t resonate with raising a teenager but it does resonate with being the oldest sister. It’s a strange and sometimes frustrating position to be in. You have to find the balance, as she did, between advice and control and letting them find their own ways.


Posted Apr. 04, 2020 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
scgirl

Join Date: 06/05/18

Posts: 245

RE: When Radha enters Lakshmi's life, Lakshmi becomes responsible for raising her headstrong younger sister. Do her conflicts with Radha resonate with any of your experiences parenting teenagers?

My teenagers were pretty reasonable, all things considered. I think Radha was difficult because for years she had been the "adult" in the family, taking over for the father when he couldn't teach and then becoming the teacher when he died. She had traveled to find her sister and then when Lakshmi wanted to treat her like a 13 year old, she rebelled. It was never going to be an easy situation.


Posted Apr. 04, 2020 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
paulak

Join Date: 04/21/11

Posts: 264

RE: When Radha enters Lakshmi's life, Lakshmi becomes responsible for raising her headstrong younger sister. Do her conflicts with Radha resonate with any of your experiences parenting teenagers?

I have never been a full-time parent of teenagers but can empathize with Lakshmi's chagrin at the changes Radha creates in Lakshmi's carefully-ordered life. It seems all of Lakshmi's work has been to bring order to a previously-chaotic life where she had little control. Now that she is the mistress of her own life, she must deal with an intruder who puts all her hard work into upheaval. She struggles to do what is right for Radha with the trade-off to her own achievements.


Posted Apr. 04, 2020 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
melanieb

Join Date: 08/30/14

Posts: 265

RE: When Radha enters Lakshmi's life, Lakshmi becomes responsible for raising her headstrong younger sister. Do her conflicts with Radha resonate with any of your experiences parenting teenagers?

Lakshmi still wants the “dream” she had for taking care of her parents to be the gift she gives to Radha and just like a typical teenager, Lakshmi’s dream is not what appeals to Radha. This is a highly relatable situation.


Posted Apr. 08, 2020 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
PinkLady

Join Date: 01/22/18

Posts: 187

RE: When Radha enters Lakshmi's life, Lakshmi becomes responsible for raising her headstrong younger sister. Do her conflicts with Radha resonate with any of your experiences parenting teenagers?

Boy do they ever! However, my teenager's rebellion was more normal teenage rebellion. Radha's rebellion had so many more layers which could have made the rebellion much harder to deal with and understand.


Posted Apr. 09, 2020 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
acstrine

Join Date: 02/06/17

Posts: 438

RE: When Radha enters Lakshmi's life, Lakshmi becomes responsible for raising her headstrong younger sister.

Lakshmi had no idea Radha even existed! How do you go about "parenting" or even "sistering" someone you do not even know? There was no gradual getting to know you or honeymoon phase. There was no time to step back, process what you just learned, and come back to it another day. Lakshmi was thrown right into trying to balance her feelings related to discovering how to be a parent/older sister and her full time work. Radha was thrown right into having to follow the directions/rules of someone else's home.

There was so much about Radha's life that was new and exciting- -she left a small, impoverished village. Arriving in Juipur must have felt like visiting Disney World to her. There were new people, new experiences, things she had never seen before. She also received positive attention from others for the first time instead of being referred to as the Bad Luck Girl. Knowing she had a safe place to sleep, food, clean clothes, and a responsible person handling the "grown up" stuff may have given her the freedom to behave in the more impulsive ways of a teenager rather than having to assume all the responsibility like she did in her village.

My teenager and I were clearer about our roles and responsibilities- -having built a relationship (obviously) as I grew as a parent and he into an independent person.


Posted Apr. 10, 2020 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
djcminor

Join Date: 03/14/19

Posts: 208

RE: When Radha enters Lakshmi's life, Lakshmi becomes responsible for raising her headstrong younger sister. Do her conflicts with Radha resonate with any of your experiences parenting teenagers?

Radha has no experience of living in a city, so she has much to learn, but she is also headstrong and thinks Lakshmi is too hard on her. Radha is so naive that she does not understand the dangers she faces. I had two sons and we certainly butted heads over what they could and could not do and what they wanted to do, especially after they got a driver's license! Parents have a fine line to walk in helping teens navigate the world safely. Lakshmi is thrown into parenthood unexpectedly. She and Radha have not had a time to build up a relationship as sisters and now Lakshmi must act like Radha's mother. Natrually, Radha will rebel.


Posted Apr. 10, 2020 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
rosemarys

Join Date: 05/29/11

Posts: 43

RE: When Radha enters Lakshmi's life, Lakshmi becomes responsible for raising her headstrong younger sister. Do her conflicts with Radha resonate with any of your experiences parenting teenagers?

I understand all the previous posts about Radha, know she had a horrible prior life, and can understand how some of her behaviors could be explained away. On the other hand, I thought she was a brat. After all she went through I would’ve guessed she might be just a tiny bit grateful or happy to have her sister along with a relatively nice, in comparison, place to live. In contrast to the people in her previous village and living with Hari, living with Lakshmi should have seemed like a dream. My one child was a difficult teenager so I could relate a little, but I also didn’t put up with much and tried to be fair while disciplining them from day one. I know Lakshmi was often very brusque and tough but in my mind Radha needed and deserved it most of the time.


Posted Apr. 12, 2020 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
beverlyj

Join Date: 12/22/11

Posts: 138

RE: When Radha enters Lakshmi's life, Lakshmi becomes responsible for raising her headstrong younger sister. Do her conflicts with Radha resonate with any of your experiences parenting teenagers?

Yes, Radha was headstrong, but she had to be if she wanted to survive and live her life on her own terms.

I had a very head strong daughter but it was difficult at times but also different I knew her and she knew me and we could talk to each other.


Posted Apr. 14, 2020 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
acstrine

Join Date: 02/06/17

Posts: 438

RE: When Radha enters Lakshmi's life, Lakshmi becomes responsible for raising her headstrong younger sister. Do her conflicts with Radha resonate with any of your experiences parenting teenagers?

rosemarys, I agree very much with what you are saying also. I was also taken aback by Radha's ungrateful attitude and selfish behavior. I thought Radha moved rather quickly from "poor, inexperienced, mistreated child" to "you all owe me anything I want whenever I want it". I think she took advantage of the guilt that Lakshmi felt about not knowing she had a sister. By this point, Lakshmi was super protective of her business and that interfered with her setting boundaries for her sister. I think Lakshmi found it easier-safer- with Radha out of the way and occupied elsewhere.

At the same time, it seems that Radha had very little parenting from her actual parents. She also spent a lot of time alone. She had no real idea how to have a respectful relationship.


Posted Apr. 24, 2020 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
beckyh

Join Date: 05/08/11

Posts: 113

RE: When Radha enters Lakshmi's life, Lakshmi becomes responsible for raising her headstrong younger sister. Do her conflicts with Radha resonate with any of your experiences parenting teenagers?

Both sisters were inserted into an untenable situation from the beginning. They didn't know each other existed and then were thrown into a situation where both had skills learned through experience with great hardship and difficulty. Unfortunately their skills did not mesh, nor were they able to appreciate the others' point of view or acknowledge their hard learned lessons. It made me think of "blended" families where both families had endured griefs and hardships the other family was not able to fully appreciate.


Posted Apr. 25, 2020 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
beckys

Join Date: 08/12/16

Posts: 233

RE: When Radha enters Lakshmi's life, Lakshmi becomes responsible for raising her headstrong younger sister. Do her conflicts with Radha resonate with any of your experiences parenting teenagers?

It certainly did! The way that Radha was rude and would strike out at Lakshmi when she asked her about her day. The way she acted almost embarrassed when Lakshmi showed up at school to take her to lunch. The way she complained that Lakshmi was trying to run her life and make all of her decisions and basically ruined everything for her. But yet, the way that Lakshmi was the first person Radha wanted whenever Kanta lost her baby, and how she really did love Lakshmi despite the way she talked to her and treated her...totally teenage behavior!


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