Do you think the Moons acted reasonably with regard to Ginny before and after Wendy was born? If you had to step into their shoes, and perceived your adopted child as a possible threat to your biological child, what would you do?

Do you think the Moons acted reasonably with regard to Ginny before and after Wendy was born? If you had to step into the shoes of Brian and Maura Moon, and perceived your adopted child as a possible threat to your biological child, what would you do?

I think Brian tried to understand Ginny and bridge the gap. Maura cut her off and was mean to her. If it were me, I would have tried to understand why Ginny was acting as she was. I would have asked questions until I understood what was happening. But if you adopt a child, you don't turn your back on her out of fear. You get help. You try harder. You set up boundaries to keep both children safe. But you do not cut yourself off from her and ignore her or, worse, yell at her and be cruel. Kindness is always a better option. Once Maura stopped talking to Ginny, any hope of understanding was lost.

I think Maura, as a first time mother, reacted fairly typically especially if she had never had family members or friends with whom she had spent much time when they had new babies. Newborns are a little scary in that situation and she really felt that Ginny was a threat. As anyone who has had more than one child will tell you, there is a lot less fear, nervousness and tension in you and you realize that babies are pretty tough. She may have over reacted but it was not because she did not care for Ginny but because she was just plan scared.

I can understand it to a point, but I think it was carried a bit far, with Maura spending ALL her time in her room. she could have only allowed Ginny supervised time, she certainly could have tried to teach her how to take care of Wendy.

I will preface this with the statement that I do not have any children. However, Maura, as a professional acted irrationally. I isn't really clear why the couple adopted Ginny...but it was clear that she had issues..issues that Maura couldn't deal with.

I believe it was mentioned that they adopted because they did not have children of their own. Even with all the training and classes the Moons had to attend before adopting, it still didn't prepare them for the emotional exhaustion they would have to face. Given that and Maura's possible postpartum depression, there was a ticking time bomb just waiting for the Moon family.
I have to admit that I would probably do anything to protect my small baby, but I would hope that I would be wise enough to ask for extra help at home.

I felt Maura’s reaction was extreme. There’s no reason why they couldn’t have supervised Ginny’s interaction with Baby Wendy and observed how she behaved. For all the talk of Ginny’s lack of attachment, I felt that Maura had no real attachment with Ginny. Once her biological child was born, she seemed to turn her back on Ginny and was very unkind to her.

I felt bad for Maura - I know with my first baby I was over-protective. It seemed that communicating with Ginny was so difficult that it was hard to understand her motives. When she was putting her baby doll in a suitcase it did scare me - so I get where Maura was coming from. But at the same time it felt so cruel that Maura and Brian had made this commitment to Ginny and then were pretty quick to turn their backs on her (especially Maura). Ginny was very lucky to have Patrice in her life.

In my opinion the Moons weren't prepared to understand Ginny's condition, situation, and behavior and totally botched parenting her. There were times when Maura's reaction to Ginny was downright small and mean. Fostering children is so demanding on the family and the Moons seemed not up to the task.

I think that Maura over reacted, and was extremely overprotective of the baby. I also think the Moons adopted Ginny, when they weren't sure that they would have a baby. I also think that Maura had no patience, was very nervous, and possible extremely hormonal. I think Brian tried very hard to be fair, and probably was exhausted, and had to help his wife.

agree with teachiz

I couldn’t help but feel that Maura would have behaved differently towards Ginny if Ginny had been her biological child. I’ve seen cases where adoptive parents have essentially “demoted” their adopted child once they had a biological child. To me, one of the saddest parts of the book was when Ginny started calling her “forever parents” Brian and Maura.

It felt like Brian made a genuine effort to maintain his relationship with Ginny while Maura simply gave up. I assume as a guidance counselor and doctor they would have been more prepared than most to deal with a special needs child, but it really felt like they were gobsmacked after the plastic doll incident. I understand as a parent the fear that your child could harm your infant could be overwhelming to the point of completely removing you and your baby form that threat as Maura tried to do, but it felt like they (and Patrice) did not do the best job of attempting to understand Ginny and her motivations and bridge the gap to create a family. Everyone seemed very isolated within the framework of the Blue House.

I became frustrated and even angry with Maura early on because I felt she was quick to abandon Ginny. In a sense she abandoned her husband also, as he was left to do everything with Ginny while Maura took responsibility for the newborn. I understand her feeling protective and all, but somehow her rejection of Ginny to such a degree did not seem realistic or, I hope, even probable in a real life situation. By this I mean that in a real situation, I would hope that possible parents for Ginny would be more closely monitored or screened so that such abandonment might never occur and Ginny might never have to feel rejected. I hope that parents for a special child such as she might understand and accept their responsibilities and be committed totally before ever being selected. I thought Brian was a credible and understanding father, and I felt he, too, was sort of left hanging in this situation by his wife.

One aspect of the book I really appreciated was that The Moons were not portrayed as perfect people; they lose their cool and snap at Ginny, and at times Maura especially behaves quite badly – but in a way- perhaps we all might react the same if we were in her position.

From the start I had the impression that the whole adopting a challenging child was Brian's idea, his "project," if you will. He seemed much more determined to work with Ginny than Maura was. While I understand Maura's fear as a new mother, like others I was frustrated by her lack of commitment to working the situation out with Ginny. She was treating the poor girl like a pet they got from the Humane Society rather than a damaged child who needed a stable environment.

I think the Moons response was very honest and real. Prior to getting pregnant with Wendy, they figured they would not have their own child and given their professional backgrounds, were more capable than most to raise a child with Ginny's special needs. I think it is very realistic that upon her pregnancy, Maura became concerned and protective over the new infant. It is one thing to put yourself as an adult in harm's way. That is an adult making a choice. However, with another child, that child's best interest and safety must take precedence. Even if both children had been their natural born children, they would have needed to provide a safe environment for both, even if it means moving Ginny somewhere that could better meet her needs. I have known families that had the painful task of giving up adopted children because they posed a serious threat to the other children in the family. It is awful for everyone involved, but no one knows how a situation will unfold over time and ultimately, parents make difficult decisions for the good of the majority.

I have never liked a character less than I liked Maura. First of all, both parents knew Ginny was a difficult placement when they adopted her. They knew she had special academic needs. They knew she had autism, and I would hope that they would have educated about it themselves prior to fostering and then adopting Ginny. Ginny's behavior with the doll was alarming. However, rather than asking questions, looking more deeply into her background, probing about the Baby Doll, Maura in particular, made assumptions and rejected Ginny outright. Brian had always seemed more accepting of Ginny, more involved with her care. Did these two discuss how challenging a special needs adoption would be? Were they both truly committed from the beginning? You do not turn your back on a child just because "a better one" comes along. Brian was put in a position of having to choose between Maura and Wendy and Ginny, three people he loved.

I don't think they acted responsibly after Wendy was born - or at least Maura did not. Her hysteria got old very quickly - I assume you cannot reason with an autistic person, but to just close her out made no sense. Allow Ginny to see the baby, see what Laura was doing, know that Wendy was being taken care of. How could she be so naïve to not know that Wendy would be worried and that given the circumstances she grew up in, Ginny needed some support through this.

I don't think they acted responsibly after Wendy was born - or at least Maura did not. Her hysteria got old very quickly - I assume you cannot reason with an autistic person, but to just close her out made no sense. Allow Ginny to see the baby, see what Laura was doing, know that Wendy was being taken care of. How could she be so naïve to not know that Ginny would be worried and that given the circumstances she grew up in, Ginny needed some support through this. My brother and sister were both adopted and there was never any question about them being true brother and sister. To treat Ginny differently that a natural child was irresponsible. They should have know what they were signing on to and gotten help when it became overwhelming.

Brian and Maura had to know that they were adopting an autistic child - almost teenager. Maura didn‘t seem to want to be Ginny‘s mother at all. I wonder whether Brian talked her into that adoption. Maura was cold before Wendy‘s birth and appeared to have postpartum depression afterwards. She needed as much counseling as Ginny, if not more. Frankly, at times I almost wanted to shake her. We’re not told anything that would make us think that Ginny would be a serious threat to Wendy. Why, then, did Maura close herself off from Ginny from the day Wendy came home?

Brian, on the other hand, did whatever he could to understand and bond with Ginny. He seemed to know what it meant to be a Forever Dad. He had to deal with Ginny‘s actions as well as with Maura‘s problems, on top of having a new baby. That couldn‘t have been easy for him, and yet he dealt with Ginny as reasonably as I could imagine. Ginny was their daughter and that was that. The rest is about parenting, which is rarely easy.

No, but I don't have children. I found their reaction to segregating mom and baby from Ginny an over reaction. And, when Brian is telling Ginny she can't go near the room or try helping out, I was frustrated with the whole story. It was a lot of repetative behavior and Ginny was not supported. Early on I figured out that the baby doll was a real baby.