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Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow


"Delightful and absorbing ... expansive and entertaining."
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Sadie tells Sam, "Lovers are ... common...Because true collaborators in this life are rare." Do you agree? How do you think this plays out in the book?

Created: 03/30/23

Replies: 13

Posted Mar. 30, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
davinamw

Join Date: 10/15/10

Posts: 3444

Sadie tells Sam, "Lovers are ... common...Because true collaborators in this life are rare." Do you agree? How do you think this plays out in the book?

In explaining why they never became lovers, Sadie tells Sam, "Lovers are ... common. Because I loved working with you better than I liked the idea of making love to you. Because true collaborators in this life are rare" (page 393). Do you agree? How do you think this plays out in the book? In what ways to you think her love for Marx is the same, and how is it different?


Posted Apr. 02, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
Borntoread

Join Date: 09/04/18

Posts: 38

RE: Sadie tells Sam, "Lovers are .....

I'm not sure that lovers are so common, but I do agree that true collaborators in life are rare. Finding people you "grok" with (to use the book's term) in a work project is truly satisfying. I am lucky to have two work colleagues who have been true collaborators. To me, this is a rare and precious gift.


Posted Apr. 04, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
Galatea

Join Date: 10/21/22

Posts: 24

RE: Sadie tells Sam, "Lovers are .....

At 77 I only partly agree with this statement. While lovers might be common, what is needed for a marriage to last a lifetime is a collaborator. And yes, they may be rarer, but it is basically a mindset that views the activity, be it a work project or a marriage, as something that requires the active contribution both members, on an equal footing. With give and take from both partners.


Posted Apr. 04, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
terriej

Join Date: 07/28/11

Posts: 422

RE: Sadie tells Sam, "Lovers are .....

I agree! Lovers are common - one can be a lover with no emotional feelings. Life long collaborators are few and far between.


Posted Apr. 04, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
jos

Join Date: 03/14/21

Posts: 139

RE: Sadie tells Sam, "Lovers are .....

Those two words can have so many meanings! I think Sadie was trying to tell Sam they had a deep friendship in work and in life, that they were soulmates in friendship which made their work collaborations special


Posted Apr. 05, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
sweeney

Join Date: 05/24/11

Posts: 185

RE: Sadie tells Sam, "Lovers are .....

It is so true that amazing and enduring relationships are so much more than the physical. It does take learning to compromise and work together whether the relationship is a working relationship, a friendship, or a marriage.


Posted Apr. 05, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
dee deek

Join Date: 10/20/21

Posts: 16

RE: Sadie tells Sam, "Lovers are .....

When I read this line in the book my heart broke and I could hardly breathe.
In 1981 I was asked to join a tiny company that was writing application software (tax preparation) for the emergence of the personal computers starting to flood the market. When the business sold in 84’ my business partner and I started another software business that we ran for another 10 years. We married in 87’. We then built a boat and sailed together for 10 years until my husband died. We were together 24/7 working and playing for over 25 years. He was my lover, my best friend, my true collaborator in business and life. So I do believe this is very rare and am so grateful I was able to experience this in my life.


Posted Apr. 05, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
candacef

Join Date: 12/02/15

Posts: 48

RE: Sadie tells Sam, "Lovers are .....

Relationships are complicated and are work. Whether it be a marriage or working situation, the success of the relationship depends on understanding and accepting each others differences and usually forgivingness is involved. When lots of work and hours spent on projects, a bond is formed and continues to grow. I think there is an understanding and bond that is hard to explain but is just known in the heart.


Posted Apr. 05, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
mali

Join Date: 05/01/20

Posts: 24

RE: Sadie tells Sam, "Lovers are .....

I believe lovers can be common, but soulmates are rare. In this case, Sadie and Sam are creative soulmates. I was happy to see the author didn’t try to force a romantic relationship between them.


Posted Apr. 09, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
mceacd

Join Date: 07/03/18

Posts: 132

RE: Sadie tells Sam, "Lovers are .....

Whether lovers are rare or scarce, true collaborators are quite rare. True collaboration requires trust and respect more than anything, and so does mutual love (as opposed to mere lovers.) Sam and Sadie loved each other, but their love was fraught with mistrust. Considering their mutual mistrust, pursuit of romance would have likely ruined their collaboration.


Posted Apr. 10, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
rebeccar

Join Date: 03/13/12

Posts: 548

RE: Sadie tells Sam, "Lovers are .....

Lovers can be common when one considers that the expression "friends with benefits" even exists and that "hooking up" often means casual sex. SO in that sense, lovers are common; LOVE is more rare; however, even love needs collaboration to last a long time. While Sadie may not have felt physically attracted to Sam as she was her professor, I think she feels a soulmate connection because they are such a great team (collaborators).


Posted Apr. 10, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
JustSP

Join Date: 06/30/20

Posts: 21

RE: Sadie tells Sam, "Lovers are .....

I loved this line. It gives true insight into collaboration as a real relationship skill. TRUST!


Posted Apr. 17, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
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patriciag

Join Date: 07/11/14

Posts: 69

RE: Sadie tells Sam, "Lovers are .....

Yes, I agree! I've been blessed in my marriage of over fifty years with a husband who is lover, partner, collaborator, muse, and strength. I also had the great pleasure in my career/vocation as a middle school teacher to be teamed with colleagues/collaborators who made every day creative and supportive.


Posted Apr. 22, 2023 Go to Top | Go to bottom | link | alert
djcminor

Join Date: 03/14/19

Posts: 208

RE: Sadie tells Sam, "Lovers are .....

Sadie and Sam have a true friendship that would be ruined if they became lovers. Together they can create and share ideas and talents without being involved as lovers.


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