Summary and book reviews of In The Meantime by Iyanla Vanzant

In The Meantime

Finding Yourself and the Love that You Want

By Iyanla Vanzant

In The Meantime
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  • Hardcover: Jan 1998,
    366 pages.
    Paperback: Sep 1999,
    255 pages.

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Book Summary

You know where you want to be, but you have no clue how to get there. You know exactly what you want in life, but what you want is nowhere in sight. Perhaps your vision is unclear, your purpose still undefined. On top of it all, your relationships, particularly your romantic relationships, are failing. If these scenarios feel familiar way down in the deepest part of your gut---then you, my dear, are smack dab in the middle of the meantime.

Your mother, bless her heart, and your father, with all of his good intentions, did not prepare you for the meantime. They did not because they could not. No one can prepare you or help you find what you are looking for. What you need is love, not romance. Love, not more money. Love, not a new car. Love is the only thing that can make the meantime worthwhile. Once you find love, true selflove, and unconditional love for everyone all the time, things will look, feel, and be a lot better. The question is: What do you do in the meantime?

Every living being wants to experience the light of love. The problem is that our windows are dirty! The windows of our hearts and minds are streaked with past pains and hurts, past memories and disappointments. The windows are so clouded by fear, self-doubt, and inaccurate information that the light of love cannot shine through. In the meantime, we keep looking through the foggy window, trying to convince ourselves that what we see is the real thing. It's not, and we know it, but we can't seem to figure out what to do until the real thing comes along. What we must do is clean. We must clean the windows, floors, walls, closets, and corners of our mind. We must mop and sweep away the stuff that trips us up, keeps us confused, and makes the meantime miserable. In this book, Iyanla Vanzant tells us how we can do this thorough mental housekeeping. If we do a good job of it, the light will come through. Once that happens, our spirits will shine, bringing in the light of true love and happiness.

From Chapter One

She was not looking for him. He was not looking for her. As a matter of fact, they were both somewhat attached to other people. Yet, the minute they saw each other, their body parts began to twitch, and their eyes began to sparkle. The meantime was brewing. They worked their way across the room, neither aware that the other was doing the same thing. He spoke first. No, she did. She asked him a silly question to which he and his twitching body parts were more than willing to respond. He ducked his attachment. She ducked hers. They needed some time to talk. They did, and they laughed, something neither of them seemed to do very often with their attachments. They exchanged telephone numbers to their places of employment. Although they both knew, they both acted like they didn't. Reluctantly, they both rejoined their attachments, and together they entered a simmering pot of meantime stew.

When you are not happy where you are and you are not quite sure if you ...

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Reviews

Media Reviews
Library Journal

Self-help counselor Vanzant talks about creative and honest use of the "meantime" between relationships to help women (and men) avoid repeating unproductive behaviors of the past....[the] tone conveys empathy and no-nonsense, this-is-good-for-you advice.

Booklist - Lillian Lewis

Vanzant has written another powerful book on positive thinking.....The steps for self-reflection that are outlined begin with enjoying and learning from the "meantime," that period of time between seeking love and finding love. Vanzant presents a series of survival tidbits for the African American woman that are well worth following.

Reader Reviews
Zodwa

In the mean time
After reading this book my life change completely for the best. I started seeing every relationship I had a preparation towards the best that is to come. I'm now in a very happy relationship that I appreciate so much, not carrying the baggage of the...   Read More

Marilyn D McNeil

In the Meantime
This is an excellent choice for broken hearted women. I read this book my freshman year of college and now I have a Masters Degree in Organizational Management and in pursuit of a CACR as a Substance Abuse Therapist. The love I was looking for was ...   Read More

amy valerie

opened up...
I've always been a open minded person, that is willing to change my perspective of life every chance I have. This book played a huge part in my life, helping me to recognize where I stand in love's house for myself. I realized how much I do love ...   Read More

Kelly Wilhoit

In the Meantime
Excellent Book! Before reading this book, I was a mess. Always unsure of myself. I didn't trust me... I was always asking for other peoples advice for fear of making a mistake. I was always attracting negative energy, and blaming other people for ...   Read More

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