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Is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law inherently volatile?

Created: 12/28/12

Replies: 13

Posted Dec. 28, 2012 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
admin

Join Date: 10/11/10

Posts: 369

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Is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law inherently volatile?

Marilyn thinks, "Mothers and daughters-in-law: such volatile, loaded relationships." Is there something about Marilyn and Thisbe that makes it hard for them to be close? Is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law inherently volatile?


Posted Jan. 05, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
susanr

Join Date: 04/14/11

Posts: 80

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RE: Is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law inherently volatile?

Absolutely not. I think that the problems with Marilyn and Thisbe are due to their personalities (actually Marilyn's personality) not because they are mother/duaghter in law. Despite all of the mother in law jokes and comments that you here, it possible to have a wonderful and loving relationship between a mother and daugjter in law but like all relationships - it takes some work to make it a good relationship


Posted Jan. 05, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
Beth350

Join Date: 04/15/11

Posts: 62

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RE: Is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law inherently volatile?

Not necessarily. Sometimes a woman can be closer to her mother-in-law than to her own mother because she comes to the relationship as an adult, without the baggage of having been a child in the home. I think it can depend a lot on the son's relationship with his mother also. If the mother-in-law feels that her son's wife is taking him away from her, it can be a problematic relationship, but if she feels she has gained a daughter or a new friendship, they may have an excellent relationship.


Posted Jan. 05, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
sallyh

Join Date: 09/07/12

Posts: 56

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RE: Is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law inherently volatile?

Not inherently. It certainly can be, but depends on the people involved - and not just the MIL and DIL, but the son and other family members as well.


Posted Jan. 05, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
joyces

Join Date: 06/16/11

Posts: 235

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RE: Is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law inherently volatile?

I have to say that I have seen some really difficult mother-in-law/daughter-in-law relationships but I have also seen some really great ones. It really comes down to the personalities involved. I think Thisbe was probably a great daughter-in-law and definitely tried to be but Marilyn's sort of posessivenes about her son was the point of strain there.


Posted Jan. 06, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
debrals

Join Date: 11/28/11

Posts: 21

RE: Is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law inherently volatile?

No-I think that no one would have been good enough for Marilyn's son.


Posted Jan. 06, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
lorie

Join Date: 05/19/11

Posts: 24

RE: Is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law inherently volatile?

No, I think it just depends on the individuals involved and their ability to open their families to others. It seems there are often grudges people hold onto because of events that took place early in the relationship, and it's hard to change a bad dynamic. There are a lot of families who are very clannish and exclude the inlaws in many ways, even photographs. Some mothers-in-law are thrilled to have a daughter-in-law if they only had sons; others like to be the queen bee.


Posted Jan. 07, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
Retired Reader, NE

Join Date: 09/16/11

Posts: 83

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RE: Is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law inherently volatile?

Marilyn seems to be the problem in this relationship. When a marriage is strong, I think the MIL/DIL situation becomes easier. Thesbe and Leo's marriage doesn't appear to have been on the strongest foundation. This family seems to have been gifted with the selfish gene along with the need for competition.l Noelle's children despite growing up in Israel are disturbingly competitive.


Posted Jan. 07, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
jknapp

Join Date: 04/11/11

Posts: 37

RE: Is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law inherently volatile?

I have had two mother-in-laws. One was a tenuous relationship and the other would have been very good had she lived long enough for us to really get to know one another. I don't think it is an automatic negative to have a MIL. You just know that you are not her child and that relationship will never change.


Posted Jan. 07, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
jeffs

Join Date: 06/18/12

Posts: 47

RE: Is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law inherently volatile?

I don't think there is any inherent volatility between between a mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. I think it depends on the individuals. In the case of Marilyn i agree with everyone here, that no one would be good enough for her son. Thisbe seems an easy going personality and that will always clash with a personality like Marilyns.


Posted Jan. 07, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
marjoriea

Join Date: 06/14/11

Posts: 8

RE: Is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law inherently volatile?

Of course!


Posted Jan. 07, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
lynneb

Join Date: 08/23/11

Posts: 47

RE: Is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law inherently volatile?

Marilyn and Thisbe's relationship was not particularly volatile in my interpretation. It seemed there was no more friction than the usual jealousy of the woman who tried to share a mother's love for her son.


Posted Jan. 16, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
pennyp

Join Date: 03/22/12

Posts: 107

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RE: Is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law inherently volatile?

as a mother, as long as my son is treated well and is happy, I love my daughter-in-law


Posted Feb. 02, 2013 Go to Top | Bottom | link | alert
bettyt

Join Date: 05/12/11

Posts: 118

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RE: Is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law inherently volatile?

Absolutely not! It depends on the individuals. Sometimes the mother-in-law can fill the place of the mother that the daughter-in-law perhaps never had. Then again there are those instances when they cannot get along. But I think these are ones where one or the other feels threatened.


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